I began the draft of this post in Feb 23, 2016. It is more than 2 years now from the incident. There has always been a struggle within me whether to tell the “whole” story, both as a way to let those involved to see my perspective and to document this incident. On the other hand, I do not want this post to give the impression of a desire to condemn anybody. Furthermore, without the input of all people involved, this could be a “biased” view. On further thoughts, all views are bound to “biased” in a sense. I hope to give my perspective of the incident as an initiative for dialogue, and hopefully, leading to spiritual growth and understanding of God’s will for all parties concerned.
I also have to balance between readability of this post, thus not making it too long, and providing enough details that the reader can make out what had happened. I would also like to make a clear distinction between facts and my own perception/opinion; though in real life, the boundary between the two can never be clear. I will use letters to refer to people. For those who know these people, the people being referenced would be easily identifiable. The purpose is not to make all these characters involved anonymous, but to direct readers’ focus on the events/issues instead of on the personalities. I hope that reviewing and reflecting upon this incident would help us learn what is the will of God for His church on earth and how to better deal with relationship issues in church.
Here is my story:
What is this picture?
This picture is part of a letter we (my wife and I) received from Pastor H in the name of the Governing Board of KCAC on the morning of Feb. 7, 2016. It highlights what amounts to “excommunication” of both myself and my wife from KCAC. We were not allowed to return to KCAC as a Sunday worshipper or an occasional speaker and implied that our church membership was terminated. Removal of these prohibitions would require interviews and applications.
My perspective:
- We were sad as well as angry.
- Angry because of the insincerity which we did not expect to see in the communication between “brothers and sisters”. The paragraph began with “… are always welcome …” and in fact conveying the opposite message.
- Angry because it was “illegal” to terminate our church membership this way. There was no due process in making this decision. It was not carried out according to the bylaws of KCAC.
- Angry because this letter was not properly issued. It did not have a signature and a named responsible person. The church “seal” was faked.
- Sad because we sensed the “animosity” exhibited in this letter. We had declared that we were leaving the congregation. The sole perceived purpose of this letter was to hurt us by “excommunication” as a “punishment”.
- Sad because there were brothers and sisters in the governing board who knew us and the issues and yet endorsed issuing of this letter.
- Sad that people “leading” the congregation did not know what the church is all about. Speaking the truth with love is the foundation principle governing the relationship between church members. Failing that, the bond among church members is broken.